24 October 2008

'Cause I Never Felt the Desire, 'Til Their Music Set Me On Fire

This article is the greatest thing I've ever read.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/10/23/AR2008102303330.html?hpid=opinionsbox1

I think my favorite part is when he says, "I was wondering why you guys wanted me here. I'm not going to get up on a soapbox here. I am a piano player."

16 October 2008

Why Debate Politics When You Can Make Fun Of People's Clothes?

Sometimes I wonder if Cindy McCain and Michelle Obama call each other before each public outing that they attend, just to see what the other is wearing.

"Hey, Michelle, this first debate looks like it'll be pretty casual. What do you think?"
"Yeah, Cindy, I agree. I was thinking floral. Something bright and friendly that will bridge the gap between summer and fall fashion, since it is still September."
"I agree, Michelle. Good plan! I think I will go with a pants suit. Still professional, but not as dressy as a skirt suit. Remember, we have to make sure we have room to move up on the scale of formality as the campaigns progress!"
"Good idea, Cindy. Make sure you wear a bright color - you wouldn't want to get lost on that stage!"
"All taken care of, Michelle."

And thus, their outfits for the first debate were planned:

Clearly, they'd have to mix things up a bit for the next debate.

"Cindy! Did you see the pictures? We looked FABULOUS!"
"Indeed we did, Michelle. So, what were you thinking about for the next event?"
"Well, I'm not sure...it's getting to be fall, so I think florals might be a bit out of place. Plus, I think we should be a bit dressier this time. We want to look like First Ladies, not someone at their husband's office picnic, making nice with the boss's wife."
"Agreed. I think I shall go with a skirt suit this time."
"An excellent plan. What color were---"
"Dibs on blue!"
"DAMMIT. That means that I have to wear red, since any self-respecting political wife wouldn't be caught dead in a color that isn't on the flag. I bet the stupid carpet will be red, too. I'm going to blend in and no one will be able to see me!"
"Sucks to be you. Should've jumped in faster."
"Yeah, I know. I'll get you next time."

Then, the third debate last night:

"OMG, Michelle, did you see how awesome those pictures turned out from the last debate? That is so my new Facebook picture."
"For you, maybe...I look like part of the rug! I totally call dibs on blue this time."
"Fine by me. You know we can't wear the same color to two events in a row, especially if our outfits look the same."

"Correct you are. Unfortunately, I only have one style of dress."
"Yeah, I have the same problem. I know, I'll dress up my suit with giant gold buttons! My husband was in the Navy, so it'll just look like I'm supporting his military history by dressing like a sailor!"
"That doesn't make any sense, but whatever floats your boat. Get it? Boat? Because he was in the Navy?"

And thus, we have last night's wardrobe. Unfortunately, no one thought to warn Michelle Obama that the background was blue, so she met the same fate she had in Nashville. Luckily, most people were blinded by Sailor Cindy's bling, so no one noticed. Not that they could see her anyway.

13 October 2008

All For Three Small Payments of $19.99!

So, today is one of those special federal holidays that no one has off from work except for government employees and contractors. Apparently no one cares about Columbus or Veterans except for the government. Works for me, though! Instead of spending my day studying, or doing some of the work that I brought home from last week because I'm currently two people's worth of work, I instead have been watching television and sorting through old papers that I've been meaning to file. A moderately productive set of activities - I watched the entire first disc of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia (which was awesome, and I wish I'd gotten more than one disc from Netflix), and made a significant dent in the paper pile. However, when I ran out of It's Always Sunny, I started watching sitcom reruns on cable rather than any of the million DVDs I have. Let me just tell you, there are some interesting commercials that they play during the day. I've seen the following commercials for the following products and events multiple times:

-Bodily improvement products such as Bio-Oil and Hydroxycut
-Various types of laxatives and hemorrhoid creams

-Malpractice lawyers
-Cleaning products (but not normal ones...weird complicated things sold on infomercials)
-Syndicated game shows that I didn't even know had been resurrected
-Numerous different educational advancement institutions
-The switch to digital television signals this spring

Apparently everyone who watches TV on weekdays is unhappy with their body, has lower GI problems that possibly resulted from medical malpractice, and sits around in their filthy houses watching game shows rather than going to school. But they want to make sure that these people know that, come February 17th, they won't be able to watch TV anymore without cable.

On that note, I just found the episode of Full House where Uncle Jesse and Becky get married. Jesse decides he wants to go skydiving as a "last adventure," and ends up in jail in "Tomato Country." Hijinks ensue. I am going to go rot my brain watching that so I'm extra-productive when I finally sit down to do the work I brought home. Thank you, Christopher Columbus!

10 October 2008

Goin' to the Chapel

A few weeks ago, Tricia and I went to Sara's wedding. I was a bit remiss in promptly blogging about the festivities; as Sara said, "I was a little upset you blogged about Billy Joel, but not my wedding :P" I promised her that I didn't not love her, but I had been waiting for their professional photographer to post the pictures she took online, so I could use them to supplement those that Tricia and I took. There's also a fuller set on Facebook, for anyone who has found their way there.

So, the wedding was at Sara and Josh's old church in Baltimore, which was lovely. Here is the beautiful bride walking down the aisle with her parents: And in the act of getting married. Isn't her dress pretty?
A pretty shot of the wedding party from the balcony of the church:
Yay, married!
After the ceremony, the bride and groom (or Mr. and Mrs. Lewis, as Sara has requested I call them) exited the church while their audience blew bubbles.
Next, they greeted the guests who had just blown them. Notice me with a camera in my hand...for a change.
The reception was held at the American Visionary Art Museum in Baltimore:
There was a cocktail hour in the garden outside before the reception started. Yay for Hood girls!
The bride and groom arriving at the reception:
And cutting their pretty (and delicious) cake:
It's not a Hood wedding until you've made the bride sing the Nun Song...although now every time I see this picture it gets stuck in my head. Not that that's bad, but it's not exactly the best of songs to be singing around one's office.
There was also some dancing. Pretty, slow dancing:
And other types of dancing too....


There are plenty more dancing pictures on Facebook and my Webshots page (which, if you don't know how to get there, chances are, I don't want you seeing them.)
After the reception, many of the guests gathered in the bar at the hotel to socialize with the new Mr. and Mrs. Lewis. You know it's a party when this happens:
However, we were all very tired, no one more so than the bride:
And now it's time to harass the happy couple for honeymoon pictures!

06 October 2008

We Spend Our Nights So Bon Vivant

So as you all probably know, Taryn returned from Spain this weekend, and came to Frederick to fetch McKenna. It was quite the event, getting to the airport to pick her up at the hotel where she spent Friday night. Apparently no one between Frederick and Chantilly thought it would be wise to drive the speed limit. Nothing infuriates me more than people who bedeck their cars in Nascar-themed paraphernalia, only to drive 5 miles under the speed limit on a one-lane road. But I finally made it (a whole half an hour later than expected), and we went to lunch at a rather special little restaurant called The King's Bite. I'm sure she will describe this place in detail on her blog, but basically, it was a tiny takeout place recommended by a cab driver that morning, which reminded us of Babu's Dream Cafe on Seinfeld. After lunch, we returned to Frederick, where McKenna about had a heart attack from glee at seeing her mother. After relaxing for awhile, we went to the cheap theater to see Mamma Mia for...let's say, not the first time. It gets no less awesome the more you see it, particularly the end. And we've seen it enough to know. My goal is to see it at least once more before it leaves theaters - anyone interested?

On Sunday, we were joined by Tricia to go to a concert in Baltimore. This concert was quite the event. Last week, Sara had sent me a link to the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra's site for their performance of Billy Joel music, along with Michael Cavanaugh, the kickass singer who was in Movin' Out on Broadway and strangely resembles Luke Russert when you see him up close. Sara is Favorite Person of Last Week for sendng this. I don't know if it was some type of special discount that was just in the link she sent, or if I didn't know that you could do this, but we were able to get tickets for just $20 apiece. Yay, cheap tickets!

The concert was at the Meyerhoff Symphony Hall in Baltimore, a lovely venue. However, you might not realize this judging by the number of people who thought jeans were appropriate attire for the symphony. Also popular were boldly patterned jackets, knee-high boots (which seemed to cause the wearers to clomp around like Clydesdales), and/or musically-themed ties (although, sadly, no piano key neckties. Mugatu would be sad), although luckily not all on the same person. All in all, a veritable wonderland of poor fashion choices.

Once we were seated, we began to notice the great number of elderly people. Apparently a nearby retirement center provides transportation for their residents to attend the symphony. Taryn likened it to the scene in The Producers where Max Bialystock goes to Little Old Lady Land and they're all dancing with their walkers. However, no one thought to warn these people that the day's program consisted of 70's and 80's pop music, presented by not only the orchestra, but also a very exuberant young man who frequently referred to his audience as "you guys," and often requested for them to clap or snap along with his songs. Not at all unusual for the musical selections, but clearly, it rattled some of the audience members. More than one person got up during the show to sit in the lobby, or perhaps leave, which was sad, because it was all kinds of awesome. Others sat there like stones when poor Michael Cavanaugh would try to encourage audience participation, including the person sitting next to Taryn, who left at intermission. This gentleman, who greatly resembled Howie Long of the era when he did commercials with Teri Hatcher, would fall in the category of "people wearing symphonic neckties." Clearly, the tie did nothing to encourage his enjoyment of this particular music. Honestly, I don't understand what these people expected of a concert that was advertised as being "The Music of Billy Joel," and featuring a vocalist! I understand that perhaps the elderly people were not familiar with it, particularly if the information was not passed along by whoever at the retirement home had organized the symphony activity, but a number of these people were of an age that they should recognize Billy Joel, and know if it is something that they would be interested in.

As for the concert itself - on the whole, it was very well done, and an interesting take on Joel's music. It was nice of them to include some of his classical pieces in addition to his more common works, and the orchestration added a great new dimension to some of the songs (although not all...there is no reason whatsoever to mess with the beginning of Angry Young Man. None.). Definitely worth the ticket price, if not more. I would highly encourage attendance if you ever get a chance! Just don't follow the kind of directions that Taryn's GPS gave us on the way out of the city...it seemed to have no problem with driving us into a traffic jam in an unfavorable area of Baltimore in an effort to get back to 95. Luckily, and to paraphrase Billy Joel, "[we] made it home alive, though you said that only proves that [the GPS is] insane."

Oh, and, as usual, bonus points to whoever guesses the song that the title lyric came from, without cheating. Yay contest!

05 October 2008

And I Think Global Warming Is Just God Huggin' Us Closer

This is what McKenna thought about the vice presidential debate on Thursday. Clearly, not a fan:


01 October 2008

Get On the Bus, Gus

So group swim lessons started this week. It has been Eventful already. Thunder and lightning cancelled the first two lessons last night (although I still had to sit there in the overcrowded office, and I ended up having to teach the third one, which will really suck when it gets to the last few weeks and I have to give cookies to one class, and do a makeup day for the other two).

Then this evening, as I was walking from the outdoor pool (where I was searching for a beach ball) to the indoor pool where my lessons were to be held, I noticed a very large bus carrying another school's volleyball team. Said bus was trying to park on the grass outside of the gym, and wasn't doing such a good job with it. I hear a loud crash, and look up to see the thing backing into a sign. I laughed really hard. Sign is pictured, as photographed from the window of my car on the way out. Still standing, but definitely a little...crooked. And the funniest thing I've seen all evening.